A Happy Peach

Things that make my heart smile…

Ladies Why Do We Do It?

6 Comments

I was just tooling around on youtube when I saw this video and thought, why are we torturing ourselves? Here are these three, let’s call them guys, telling us not be so fussy. They seem to want us with minimal make up whilst wearing wife-beaters (tank tops, vests, undershirts).

Let’s be honest girls, we get all gussied up for ourselves, because it makes us feel pretty. But we also do it for other women, because you know they’re judging you (men are judging you too, for example those three guys). You know how it is, women can be horrible to each other, so catty checking each other out and deciding if the other women passes muster or not. Maybe you don’t do that, but I think that most women have done it from time to time. I think we’re trained to do it from the time we’re small children and it can be a hard habit to break. From this we develop what I like to call survival skills. We begin with your fatigues, you have outfits you wear to the mall and ones you wear to go to the market and the comfy ones you wear in your house. You may love your comfy sweats, but you would not go to a wedding in them (unless it’s some weird P.E. themed wedding, and when is that going to happen?).  Add to this survival conditioning the fact that most people are self conscious about something, and if  you’re not, you probably haven’t figured it out yet (oh that was catty, sorry but I had some momentum going). And it’s always the dumbest smallest thing, like one eyebrow is higher than the other (it could also be that one is lower than the other, whatever floats your boat), or you don’t like the shape of your lips. And if we were to be logical about it, it’s so insignificant that we’re probably the only ones who notice it. Trust me, no one is staring at your one eyebrow that is half a centimeter higher than the other. This hyper-awareness of our looks has one byproduct, we tend to develop this paranoia by the time we’re 21 of never leaving the house without this one item, maybe earrings or lipgloss. Something about not having it makes us feel naked, maybe even vulnerable. It’s all psychological, and I think as we grow older and more confident we lose those bizarre neurotic fears, although I think some women choose to be haunted forever (scary).

As for attracting men, I think simple is better. From my experience the less made up you are, the more approachable  you appear. It makes sense, most men don’t want overly complicated women who are high maintenance. Unless he’s a metrosexual, do they still have those? And you’d be fighting over mirror time anyway (I apologize if any metrosexuals read this and also comment and let us know that you aren’t extent we can build a sanctuary for you in an Apple store) . So I guess the theorem is majority of men prefer simple while some men like a lot of glam. But when men say they want natural, they have no idea what they’re saying. Most women don’t roll out of bed looking their best, some do, but most don’t. You need to take care of your skin and apply some “freshening” make-up. You know what I’m talking about, if you have anything to conceal or didn’t get enough rest and need to um…”brighten” your look, maybe add a bit of flush or contour, and perhaps curl your lashes. The finishing touch is that natural perfect, my lips but better lipstick (the MLBBL is the holy grail by the way). They call this tactic the “no make-up make-up”, sound nuts, check out Lisa Eldridge. She’s just going to pick up her kid, but she still wants to look puuuurrrrrdeeee!!!!!

Lastly, even is a man tells you he doesn’t want you to be overly glam I don’t think he wants you to be a slob, in general they want us to look pretty and fabulous without trying to hard (good luck with that). Whether or not men realize it, they are assessing how we present ourselves. They want us to look attractive, but attainable. A gal running around in Gucci from head to toe (is sort of tacky in my taste, but to each their own) is sending a message, she’s saying I am expensive and I think I am worth it, you’re going to have to spend a lot to make me happy, I don’t want a grilled cheese sandwich. He may also decide, yes without having a conversation, that she will be too difficult to deal with, he really wants her to have that grilled cheese sandwich. Unless he’s wearing Gucci from head to toe, and then well, they were made for each other. And I say good, leave the rest of humanity alone. Now I am off, I think I’m going to make a grilled cheese sandwich (it’s always food with me, isn’t it :D)

P.S. I guess I lied when I said lastly. If I were to do the same thing those three guys did and judge basically on appearance, I would not want to be with them. They look a little to into their looks, who’s looking at them, and looks in general. It’s all a little too boring in my opinion. Although I am with them on that headband thing. What is that about? And yes I this was supposed to be read in a humorous way, no one is supposed to have hurt feelings, for those of you with hurt feelings, sorry, just form a line for hugs at the back of the theater.

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6 thoughts on “Ladies Why Do We Do It?

  1. So true Danielle, I think the best way is to do what makes you feel confident and happy!

    • Feeling confident and happy is a very attractive trait, wait do feelings count as traits? Either way I think positive folks do attract more friends and potential mates.

  2. That’s a lot of makeup for picking up your kids. About 4 minutes in to it, that’s when I came to that conclusion. My kids would think I’d abandoned them.
    I do like her lemon drop nails though!

    • Haha I know, your kids would probably start to walk home. I bet she plans ahead, like a half an hour before she hears some sort of make up alarm and rushes off to start prepping. To be honest, if I gotta be somewhere quick like that, I throw on some clothes (hopefully I match) and pop on some sunscreen and I am out the door. I am so not fussy that way.

  3. Great post! I’ve always had male chums and have been given many interventions by them over the years! Yuk to sequin dresses which I used to love, yuk to tarty leopard print and yuk to lipgloss which I used to slather on. Every guy I have ever met has thought I look best in jeans and a White t shirt.
    Oh those guys are way too into themselves!

    • I like to dress up and dress down, and I have come to the conclusion that I do it for myself. I like feeling girly, and it is a girly move. Men don’t get it, that’s why most boys won’t wear dresses (we started wearing pant after all). My theory is that men notice, but they don’t know what they’re noticing. I remember one time, when I was 18, I was wearing a leopard print top and some fool barked at me in the mall. I was so confused I was just about to turn around and sucker punch him, my friend told me it was a weird compliment and didn’t want to explain it too much. And I can also see how the goopy gloss would be a turn off, but they smell so good and look so pretty…

      I bet those guys have no idea how absurd most of us gals find them, don’t you think Tabitha?

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